Tuesday, February 9, 2016

Valentine's Day Pass-Around

This pass-around is an opportunity for you to uplift someone else.  It's not a time for you to be funny, sarcastic, dismissive, or rude. Here are some tips on how to brighten someone's day with your words:

1. Be specific.
Memorable compliments are specific.  Don't be vague when you give a compliment.  Notice what it is that compelled you to want to give the compliment in the first place, and then articulate it to the person.

2. Acknowledge their character.
When complimenting an accomplishment, don't just acknowledge what the person did.  Acknowledge who they had to be in order to accomplish it.  In other words, what did it take for them to make it happen?  Point to a person's character traits, such as perseverance, kindness, thoughtfulness, loyalty, humor, calmness, creativity or courage.  For example, "It took a lot of courage for you to speak up like that" or "You are so creative.  I love the way you put together your outfit."

3. Be authentic.
If you don't really mean the compliment, don't give it. Everyone has some character strength or gift worthy of acknowledgment.  Make a habit of finding the good in others.  Sometimes you may be the only person to point it out.  And your authentic compliment will be an extraordinary gift for that person because they rarely hear something positive about themselves from others.

4. Express your appreciation.  
When complimenting someone about something they did that benefited you, be direct in your praise.  "It meant a lot to me that .." or "I appreciate you for ..", for example.  You might assume that the people in your life know you appreciate them, but don't leave them wondering.  Say so.

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